granted you ate a flesh eating parasite and you will die in 2 years. Every woman on earth wants to fuck you but the first thing eaten is your penis

I wish for another fish (the last one got sent back for not being cooked right)

Your second wish for a second fish was now in a paper dish, but an epileptic woman killed you because she's squemish.(wow that was bad)


I wish I'm the coolest guy in school. (liez)

your wish is granted but then everyone in your school except you dies and you commit suicide because you dont get enough attention.


I wish I could become intangible at will

granted, but satan anchors you in a male locker room for all of eternity

I wish for a gun

You wished for a gun to shoot it for fun, but after a while your time in this world is done.


I wish I can make 3d renders.

Your wish is granted, but you start making your own mod called "BrainLoaf" that consumes your life and is never quite finished. You die alone and in obscurity. The mod is never released.
(A bit cheeky, perhaps?)

I wish I knew 17 different martial arts to protect me from the IronOak development team

Wish granted, but you're so flxible and powerful you kick yourself in the face and break yur own nose. Later you choke on your own blood and die.

I wish I had my computer already...

Granted your computer is here. Unfortunately when you connect it to the internet a freak lightening bolt hits your house and it becomes self-aware, quickly gaining control of government defence systems across the globe and within 10 minutes the world's population has dropped 90%.

I wish I was the world's best archer.

This post has been edited by SDWBOSS on January 27, 2008 07:18 pm

granted but your bow string snaps and you get hit in the face with an arrow and it gets stuck in your eye

I wish for a penny

I mean like the way a ghost is anchored to the place it dies (theoretically)

granted but micronazi steals the game for themselves

Where's your wish?

I wish I'm already good at the drums, good I mean Portnoy good.

Granted. However, you have this horrible tendency to smash the drums into pieces. No band hires you.

I wish I has a money.

you have a money but a hobo robs you, eats your girl friend, and sodomizes your whole family.

I wish something bad happened to mars

Granted. Hells' minions invade the planet and use it as a staging ground to invade Earth. The first place they invade is your house. They then proceed to hang you with your own intestines.

I wish I had another balloon of helium I could inhale.