QUOTE

Towards Nikku: I see you gave up on this for whatever reason. Maybe you should try not to write when you're tired or else you'll write things that you regret, like Samus type guards and robots and such.

No effence: Screw You, I wasn't thinking properly, No need to be a jerk about it.

QUOTE

Thank you for at least being able to type english properly

ofcourse that was directed to me, becuase he has something against me, I still don't know what...............

So what if my spelling is a little off, I plan when story is at least 1/4 done, I will go through and clean it up, Once again Stop polluting me Thread with this JUNK, Jenova. No need to make fun of someone becuase they made a mistake, then cuaght thems selfs for it and fixed it, shut up.

My eyes shot open I got up off the cold cement floor. I walked over to the group of prisoners who were sharing a MRE that Tex had gotten from the guard.
"Shit Man, We are running out of food." Said pedro as he threw a freeze dried brownie in his mouth.
"What we need is a map, there might be some vents or sumthing that can lead us to the Mess Hall, or The armory" said Tex as he was rubbing his fingers down the barrel of his MP5. I heard a hissing sound at the bar door to the courtyard and walked over to see a Zombiefied gaurd, Trying to get through the bar door. HE was drenched in blood, his lower jaw ripped off completely, and his ear hanging on by a thread. I saw a piece of paper hanging out of his pocket, and there were some big letters on one side that look like "plex a-c". I went up to the door his hand were trying to grab me but i was just out of reach. I looked around the room and saw a pipe laying on the floor, I sat down and took off my shoe. I realized my socks were pretty long, i took out my siz and tied it onto to pole, as secure as I could. I slid my shoe back on and stood up. "Come one you little Fuck-Face, give me that paper" I said as i stuck out the make-shift spear and stabbed it into his head. I yanked it out looked at the brain matter on it, and dropped it to the ground. I squeezed my hand through the bar and grabbed the paper.
---------------------

shit i have to go to bed!

The last post is much more descriptive and interesting than any of the others before it.

Though I'm still left wondering why they cholorofolmed someone for being fired from his I.T technician job, then shoved him in a jail filled with murderers. And how this guy becomes like a badass stone-cold killer in the space of a few days.
But other than that, zombie infested prison sounds interesting.

Oh, and one thing; stop with the "no effence" after/before you vent at someone.

ok thanks dude, oh yeah i dunno about you but i would have relized that thoose things out there weren't human, i would have done the same thing, i isnt realy a stone hard killer, i mean he only killed one so far.... but thanks....

@Jehova : I hope you two wont argue anymore. your stories are good reading. I am hungry for good stories, and yours stops the hunger a while.


This is a VERY good story. Its like someone haas killed NImmu(sry Nikku ^^ ) and writes stories under his name. I mean, before your story was dipped in typos, (not that it matters) now it is only one here and there. And all those decriptions! *Gurgle* sorry, beginning to drool now, cant write much more, have to dry up keyboard.
All this zombies in jail is interesting, as TheBlaze said.

its Nikku and thanks dude, my writing skills have improvedd alot scince i started this i think..

Yeah, he's only killed one I know, it's just the blase attitude he's taking to the whole thing. I just think he'd be more like"Oh jesus what the fuck is going on???" especially if he's an I.T technician who's experience of prison comes from playing chronicles of riddick.
I dont know about recognising zombies as inhuman though, I mean for the most part they are human. Though if they were all fucked up with bullet holes and guts hanging out and shit, I agree with you.
But hey, a simple sentence like "I looked at the snarling faces of the people pressed against the door, and saw there was nothing human about them anymore." covers all that nicely.

But like I said before, prison full of zombies has definite possibilities - will the guards and the cons work together?

One question though, is this a sci-fi story?

"unique" means one-of-a-kind.

agreed ill wokr on it... thanks

How is it Sci Fi so far? and no it wont be Sci Fi i have a Sci Fi story

This post has been edited by Nikku on February 05, 2005 01:38 am

Sorry For the launge in this story, I mean they are Prisoners....

______

I quickly jogged over to the group and as I was doing so I realized I was Mentally and Phiscally exausted, I went from a corny little cubical job to a convict surronded by man eating things, plus I just stabbed some one In the head with a fucking Knife. When I reached the group I looked around in the circle it looked like a bunch of kindergardeners sitting down a "Story Time", except they were in jail, had facial hair, smoked, and had done bad enough crimes to get in a shit hole like this. I looked at the Paper in my hand it was pretty thick, ablously folded and in a plactic baggy, i now realized it said "Complex A-C". I plopped it down in the middle of the circle and aw everyone turn to me, the Harry broke the silence.

"What the Shit" Siad harry as he looked at the paper like a confused young puppy, a jailed confused young puppy.

"Map, we can use it" Answered Tex as he put his gun aside and looked at the paper, then took it out of the bag and unfolded it. He ran his finger along the map searching for something, "Ah.... here we go" He said as he pointed to a pistol symbol on the map.

"Look Man, we could use guns, but what we need is food." Said Pedro as he scanned the off-white sheet. He pointed to a Hamburger symbol on the map, he wished they had served hamburgers there food like that was only for the gaurds. "And look Gaurd's Sleeping Chambers....."

"Look man, I ain't goin' out there for nothin' not no way no how, unless we really need to, I ain't friggin' goin'. And certainly ain't going to no fuckin' guard sleepin' chamba's or whatever." Said smokey as he lit another cig.

Tweak finally cut in and pointed to a "HQ" symbol. "Look we can't go any where becuase all the doors are in lock down mode, probauly, If we can get to tht i could up up some doors or shipment chambers or sumthing for you guys to go through, then we can make it to the 'Walls of babylion' as they are called, and escape this death trap. After that we need to get to the owner's eastate which is only 100 yards and 3 cement fences away. Once there, i c heard some gaurds talking about a self destruct thing if the whole prison went to Fuck. I think it is like a hug electric field is emitted an' kills anything inside. Sounds Good?" Said Twitch as he twitched.

"Twitch, go get a Sharpie and all the Paper You can find we need to copy this map and write down our jobs to do for each person." said Tex as he ran his hand over his shaved head.

"I have no clue how I can help, I was an MIT gradute and that it, I went to military school and camp, I was a boy scout for some years, read the anarchist cookbook a few times, What can I do" I shakingly replied.

NO comments?

I thought it might be sci-fi because of all the references to robots and samus guards - I know you got rid of them but I wasnt sure if it wasnt still set in the future.

"Alright man, are you ready for this?" Said Harry as he boosted me up into the vent and then jumping back down of the stool.

"Heh, yeah I guess..." I said as i took the flashlight that we detatched from the mp5 out of my pocket and shined it onto the silver walls of the vent. I un folded the map that was sloppily jammed in my pocket. I shined the light on my pocket and put the flashlight in my mouth and started to burn the image into my head, as Harry closed the vent opening. I got a ripped piece of pillow case and stabbed a small hole in it with my shiv, I then slid the flashlight threw the hole and it was nice and tight, barely fit in. The attable thing on the end keeped it from falling out, I tied the cloth over my head and mad a make shift head lamp. I started to crawl on my belly through the shaft untill i came to a turn. I stuck my head over the corner and peeked to see if a rat or soemthing was waiting to take a chunk out of my face. I shoved my hand up and grabbed the corner, I then pulled myself up and slid my feet on the corner and began to crawl once again.
------------------------------

fuck i g2g eat!
comments/ feedback please

Great story i would not be suprise if it was made into a movie daveroxzor u have know idea what a good stoy is u are so stupuid

dude, chay, man David likes it he didnt understand what it was Everything is fine, thanks man, he thought the first post was the whole story so DAvid dont Pay attention to when he called u stupid, I kno chay he R teh Freind of mine in real life

Nice story, don't turn this into a flame thread don't want to lock it.